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Most of what you assume is wrong

What are your dreams?

Want to make a lot of money?  You can.

Work for a big, reputable company or a small indie darling?  You can.

Want to run your own successful business?  You can.

Land your dream job, get in shape, marry a wonderful spouse, etc?  Yup, you totally can.

I’ve shared a lot of very personal conversations with a friend recently that all comes down to two core questions:

Who are you?  What can you actually do?


If you’ve ever used the phrases “If only I….”, or “I wish…”, then you’ve had some sort of fantasy in which you are in a different position than you currently are.

I don’t intend to be the life coach, self-help, personal development guru of “you can do anything you set your mind to!” but I do intend to inform you that you’re a lot closer to your dreams than you think.

For example, I’ve assumed these various things in my life, falsely:

  • I would never get married because I wouldn’t find a woman I liked who didn’t want me to be different.
  • I would never get to work in the industries I most desired to.
  • I would never work on projects I consider “cool” and be proud to have my name attached to.
  • I would never be able to change my career path.
  • I would never escape a toxic employer.
  • I would never make it in a big city.
  • I would never finish unique, interesting personal projects because I was too flaky.
  • I would never be able to afford extravagant things, like a nice car or “exotic” vacation.
  • I would never be able to make money online.

You get the idea.  None of those things were true.

Why?  Because I am actually a different person than how I view myself.


To reference the idea of “fake it ’till you make it”, many of us tend to market ourselves as something we aspire to be rather than what we actually are.  We do this – I do this – because I’m not satisfied with my own perception of my reputation.

But realistically you aren’t who you think you are.  More accurately, you are as you act.

I’ve talked before about my struggles with finishing things.  The friend whom I referenced earlier has had struggles with commitment.

But realistically today, I finish most of my projects.  On this site, I’ve released two software products and a free ebook.  Despite that, my personal perception is still that I’m a non-finisher.

My friend is the same way, after spending many years living a noncommittal lifestyle this individual has spent the last handful of years making big life-changing commitments.  On top of that, each commitment has made my friend’s life better and happier.  But said friend still views themselves as someone who runs when commitment is required despite that not being true anymore.

Think about your internal monologue and how you present yourself.  What do you tell others that you run away from or that you could “never do”?

Can you actually do those things?  Do you actually do those things and minimize or not even notice the importance of them?

Getting to the goal

So just because you aren’t necessarily who you perceive yourself to be, doesn’t mean you magically have a million dollars sitting in the bank.

What it does mean though is that you might already be, or it’s possible for you to become, the type of person it takes to be to have that million dollars in the bank.

Really stop and think about that.  Imagine whatever it is you really want (the thing you’re probably even ashamed to admit because it’s vain or weird), and be honest with yourself – who do you need to be to get there?

Inside yourself, I’d bet that it may be scary, or you might be looking at a mountain you don’t know how to climb.  Despite that, I bet deep down that you know if you worked at it and prioritized it that you could accomplish your thing.

I know you can.

Everyone you see on TV, or the people/persons you idolize, have a secret.  They’re just people like you.  That means they had to work for it too and were once in a similar place mentally to where you are.

So if you take one thing away, please take this – you can.  You definitely can.

Now, will you?

Copyright 2016-2017, Adam T. Croft, all rights reserved.