Every time I create a product, I enter what I’m now coining “the miserable middle”.
No wait – that’s a dumb name, I take it back.
Everyone knows that when you start a project, 100% of the time you cannot contain your enthusiasm. You’re like “YEAH! I’m gonna make a DEMO REEL! It’s gonna be BAD. ASS.”
Then you spend the next literal 48 hours awake and cranking out this future demo reel – with every passing hour getting more and more bogged down until you finally pass out from a combination of exhaustion, lack of ideas, and you can’t hear anything straight anymore.
Then you’re so burned out that you have to give yourself a few days off, and you never get back to it.
I used to always be afflicted with that cycle. I never got anything done. Ever. Unfortunately, I’m not sure exactly what broke that in me – I know roughly the time the change happened and what I was doing, but I can’t hand you a wisdom magic bullet about the process.
I just know that one day I gave myself permission to only do a small task every day, and I was required to continue doing these small tasks until the project was done.
Now, I must finish things. It’s literally the opposite sickness. For example – I went from never finishing games to now being partially scared any time I pick up a new one. Something in my brain must complete this new game 100% (getting all items, side quests, whatever done – huge time suck, it’s awful).
I thought – when I was incapable of finishing anything – that if I had the magic formula that “high achievers” had to finish what they started, that I’d never run into any problems. My naive mind just thought I’d pick things up, work diligently, and eventually finish.
I was wrong – it doesn’t work like that.
Arguably, it’s worse now that I can finish things. I still have that ADHD brain that wants to start something new when the project gets tough, but I have this other thing now that requires me to finish the project I now loathe but need to finish.
Hence the horrible name “miserable middle”.
This happens on literally every product. The process looks something like this:
- Get an idea I’m enthusiastic about, start, and commit to its completion on my planners/journal
- Get a few days of work under my belt, feel good
- Life happens, I miss a day or two – or I run into a particularly difficult section that requires a bit more effort
- Fight the urge to procrastinate
- Eventually get back to it and finish the next step
- Start the process of self-doubt that the thing I’m making actually sucks and nobody’s going to care
- Continue the process of self-doubt, loathe the product, consider giving up and quitting
- Make sure people have paid for the product so I can’t quit
- Find a way to keep working despite my complete lack of enthusiasm
- Realize one day that I’m almost finished and review the product, realize it’s not as bad as I thought
- Find some really good bits that I’m enthusiastic about – share those things when marketing the product
- Release the product shortly after, wondering how I managed to get through that
- Be marveled that said product turned out half decent and people were willing to pay for it
And then I repeat the cycle the next time, and every time I’m surprised when I get to the middle part with the doubt and self-loathing. Every time.
Usually I write to you and have some sort of fix or moral at this point of how you can see things differently and make it all better. This time, I don’t.
This piece is more about sharing reality with you.
Here’s the thing – when you get to work on the things that interest you and drive you in your heart, you’re probably going to run into a wall. There’s probably going to be some part of what you do that sucks and requires actual mind-numbing work.
You won’t want to do it. You’ll find every excuse to procrastinate.
If the procrastination wins, you lose and won’t find success – you quit – it’s pretty simple.
Everyone (as far as I can tell) has a different way through this. There’s no “solution” I’ve ever found to make work easier – I just do it.
Unfortunately I’m also equipped with a brain that I’ve trained to rip myself to shreds emotionally, and somehow I have to find a way to ignore it and push though – that may be the way for you, or it might be easier, I don’t know.
But the biggest likelihood is this – you’ll start enthusiastic and you’ll hit some sort of wall.
This isn’t abnormal. It’s 100% normal.
If you have an inability to break through that wall, that’s also normal – you really shouldn’t beat yourself up over it because it’s not going to help you scale that wall either.
Instead – I assume you consider yourself a creative person – I implore you to use that creativity to find a way to get yourself back in front of your work again when it’s difficult.
As far as I can tell, it’s the difference between the chance at having success and a guarantee of no success.
It’s also the reality of what “hustling” looks like. True “hustle” isn’t spending hours getting an online following or building your network or whatever – it’s consistently getting in front of the work that matters the most and finishing.
It’s not easy and it’s not always fun. But you’re not alone – and I bet at least some of you are the ones who can break through that “wall” and finish what you started.
I believe in you.
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